Once you have entered the dating arena, one term you will often hear women discuss is – the Player. While he is another “jerk”, the name Player is used very loosely by women. Since I was very keen to know what women actually meant when they describe a man by calling him a Player, I went ahead and interviewed dozens of women. What emerged from these interviews was a vague description of this character, nothing solid to form a definition. But reading between the lines, I think I have identified what is meant by that word.
Women call a man a Player, when he is identified as dating several women at the same time, with the sole intention of laying them, to satiate his libido. He does not evoke trust and normally women are a bit skeptical about any liaison with a man of such dubious reputation. These references often put a bit of fright and a sense of guilt in other men, limiting our choices to a single woman for dating. It is an irony that we start believing that Players are “Bad” men, from the loose references made by women who have met them or heard of them.
The title of a Player often rubs off on other men, as they equate him with having loose morals and infamous reputation, who lays women at the first available opportunity. Where we miss out is that none of us care to go deep into this man and learn what he is doing right! We simply brush him aside, with pre-conceived notions of him being another avoidable character, who just has this amazing caliber of artful seduction.
The crux of the whole issue is that don’t be judgmental and go just by the name “Player”, without understanding him or the subtlety behind this nomenclature.
Joshua Goh is dating & relationship expert. For more information on up-to-date dating reviews and practical online dating tips & tricks, please visit Cupidwave.com
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